Everyone on Facebook is getting married and having babies… and I’m just… here

I can’t seem to scroll through Facebook or Instagram without getting smacked in the face with *boom* an engagement photo or *bam* a wedding photo or *smack* a pregnancy announcement.

I seemed to have hit that time in my life where all my friends are getting to those big moments: graduations, jobs, engagements, weddings, babies.

And yet… here I am. Barely holding myself together, all of those things still seemingly out of reach. Some of them way, way, way out of reach. The closest I am to a wedding is my pinterest board… oh and the three weddings I’ll be going to this year for friends and family.

It makes me feel so behind in life, which seems silly because, well, life isn’t really a race, is it?

But still, everyone’s steps forward intensify my feels of being stuck, of sliding backwards, of making no progress towards that vague but enticing “American dream” of a perfect life.

Social media has done this dangerous thing of being a place where people mostly post all of their best moments. Sure there are some people who post about their struggles too, but most of us aren’t brave enough to put all our problems out in the world for others to see. We want people to see our happiness, our success, our wealth and so that is what we display.

It’s easy to forget about the struggles people must go through when you’re only seeing their happiness scroll before your eyes on the internet.

So I’ve started to try and limit my time on social media, though I know that isn’t the true root of the problem. The problem is that I care. I care about comparing myself to others, using them as a measure for my success, or lack thereof. I care that my friends and family my age, or god-forbid younger than me, are celebrating huge life milestones while I’m not.

And I shouldn’t care. I mean I should – I should feel happy for them – but that happiness shouldn’t be tinged with jealousy or self-pity. I shouldn’t give a damn that my younger cousin is already married and has three kids while I’m still single.

Just because other people are succeeding does not mean you’re failing. I’m trying hard to remember that.

~ Kayla

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